Tear Soup---

This is from a great book I discovered in my counseling program at Western about 4 years ago. The book is called Tear Soup by Pat Schwiebert and Chuck DeKlyen.

The book is a story about a woman who has suffered a major loss and how she makes her own batch of "tear soup" blending different ingredients into her own grief process. It's a great book that affirms the bereaved, educates the unbereaved and can be used as a building block for children. I like that the book doesn't tell you exactly what her loss was, so it can be applied to almost anyone suffering any kind of loss and going through any level of greif. I recommend it highly!
This is from the back of the book, and isn't a part of the story, but I like the "recipe".

Grandy's Recipe for Tear Soup
Helpful ingredients to consider...

• a pot full of tears
• one heart willing to be broken open
• a dash of bitters
• a bunch of good friends
• many handfuls of comfort food
• a lot of patience
• buckets of water to replace the tears
• plenty of exercise
• a variety of helpful reading material
• enough self care
• season with memories
• optional: one good therapist and/or support group

Directions:

Choose the size pot that fits your loss. It's okay to increase pot size if you miscalculated. Combine ingredients. Set the temperature for a moderate heat. Cooking times will vary depending on the ingredients needed. Strong flavors will mellow over time. Stir often. Cook no longer than you need to.

Suggestions:

• be creative
• trust your instincts
• cry when you want to, laugh when you can
• freeze some soup to use as a starter for next time
• keep your own soup making journal so you won't forget

Serves one.

Today I'm feeling sadder than normal. I think because I talked to someone who didn't just talk, she asked good questions. I guess it's hard for me to just open up with people and call up a friend to "talk". I'd rather just keep it inside and go about my business like it's no big deal. But boy, you ask me the right questions and I can't even help myself...the tears just come out. I've noticed through this that I have a lot of friends and I really love all those people. But there are a few friends who I would die without (and a couple sisters) who want to talk about Willie, who want to talk about my pain. Sometimes I hate talking about it, but I am so grateful for those who take a second and recognize that even though I'm laughing and talking about my kids or my house-hunting or Phoenix weather..inside I'm crying and thinking about my brother and I'm missing my home and my good Shelton friends. Right now, I'm making tear soup. It's a hard job and most of the time I don't even know how I'm doing at it. I wish it wasn't going to take so long but I'm glad I have a few friends who will sit with me and help me "stir".